


The broken boys who once were wild

by theflyinganonymouse



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: ATEEZ Storyline Event, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:14:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25282927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theflyinganonymouse/pseuds/theflyinganonymouse
Summary: In a room at the Academy live eight broken boys.None of them know how they came to be at the Academy - none of them really remember very much from their lives from before - but each one of them knows that this tiny room at the Academy, with its rickety furniture and lumpy mattresses, is not the first time that they have met.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	The broken boys who once were wild

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written as each of the prompts were released which was quite the challenge! I think it came out okay though :)

In a room at the Academy live eight broken boys. 

None of them know how they came to be at the Academy - none of them really remember very much from their lives from  _ before  _ \- but each one of them knows that this tiny room at the Academy, with its rickety furniture and lumpy mattresses, is not the first time that they have met. In their hearts and in their dreams there is the desert and the scorching sun, a ship and the roaring wave, and the door to an ending which had promised a new beginning. They know that in their other lives, the one where they had been brothers more than friends, that they were wild boys, savage and hungry and so desperate to reach a treasure they can't remember. 

They want that treasure again now- from deep within their souls they can feel it calling to them. 

They don't know where to start. They are just eight broken boys with only wisps of memories and fire in their hearts. Confined to the Academy with adults who don't care for them and who don't want to understand them, who control everything but their dreams, the boys exist on hope alone. 

Hongjoong, their leader, is the one to keep that hope alive. He remembers more than the others. At night, when he dreams, he can feel the heat of the sun on his skin and taste the salt of the sea on his tongue. He feels the longing in his chest more strongly than any of the others. 

"We will find our treasure." He promises the other broken boys each night before they go to sleep. "Once we know where to look, we will find it." 

This is enough most nights but there are some when Seonghwa cannot sleep for the ache in his chest. There is someone missing from this life. He can't see her face in his mind or recall the sound of her voice in his ears but he has a bracelet that he keeps wrapped in a silk scarf that he knows is from her. It is kept hidden under his bed and he only brings it out to look at when the day has been difficult to get through. 

It's nothing much. A delicate silver chain that always feels cool against his fingers. He likes to hold it and imagine  _ her _ . Who was she? His mother? His sister? His first love? He doesn't know and it bothers him.

The silk scarf he keeps the bracelet wrapped in was hers. He knows this but he doesn't know how. On the especially hard days, the ones where it's difficult to hold onto any kind of hope, he brings the scarf to his nose and breathes in the fading scent of her perfume. It's light. He thinks that he can smell citrus and floral and woody tones but he's not sure how much of that is reality and how much is memory- or even wishful thinking. 

The nights he holds the silk scarf to his nose are nights that he dreams only of her.

He sees her face and feels the warmth of her love and he feels whole in a way he does not feel when he is awake. She is bright sunshine and fields of green. She is freedom and the feeling of belonging. She is  _ home.  _

The mornings after these dreams he remembers nothing but the fact that she exists. The emptiness her absence creates, even from his memories, is more painful than he could ever say. 

He just wishes that he could remember something of her while he was awake.

Yunho remembers more but it is not enough.

He has a brother, he knows that much, a real blood brother as opposed to the seven other broken boys he shares a room with. They are his brothers, too, of course, but he does not love them with the same ferocity that he loves his true brother. 

He sees his brother everywhere- in windows, in water, in the mirror as he brushes his teeth each morning. But only… Only it isn't his brother, Yunho knows this, it's  _ him _ . It's just that they look so much alike- didn't people always say? He thinks he remembers.

He wants to remember. 

Every day he feels like the connection between them is losing its strength and the memories grow weaker. He doesn't want to let go. What is he supposed to do when he forgets his brother entirely? Just carry on? 

This was never his dream. He had never been interested in finding the treasure, whatever that treasure may be, not until it had become his brother's dream. 

Yunho doesn't remember the details or even how he started on the journey. All he knows is that one day there had been his brother and his excited talk of treasure and then the next there had been the desert and the burning heat, his own desperate longing for a treasure he knows nothing about.

He doesn't regret setting out to search for the treasure and he definitely doesn't regret coming to meet the others, for coming to love them nearly as much as his own blood, but he just wishes that he could see his brother again. He wants to talk to him, wants him to reassure him that it's okay to follow this dream without him. 

He doesn't want to forget him. 

Yeosang doesn't have much to forget and even less that he wants to remember. His dreams never seem to be as clear as the others say theirs are and any memories he does have are hazy and hard to grasp. He sees men in black with hats and masks and empty, dark skies. He remembers fear and confusion that he wants to forget. 

The adults at the Academy, the instructors and the staff, tell him that there is so much beauty in the world but Yeosang finds it difficult to see any when they're trapped in the Academy's grey walls day after day. They only let them look at the world beyond the tiny lives they're being forced to live in textbooks and old peeling posters. 

"There must be more than this." He says, the same anxiety thrumming under skin as there always is. Each day that passes the longing for  _ something  _ grows. He does not want to be trapped here- even with the other broken boys that he calls brothers. "The world is such a big place." 

"Look at the night sky." The adults tell him. "There's enough beauty in the stars to make the rest of the world pale in comparison." 

But whenever Yeosang looks for the stars he sees nothing but empty night. 

"That's because you have the brightness of the stars deep in your heart." Hongjoong tells him, wearing the same fond smile he always does when they talk about the stars. "You see things that none of the rest of us do." 

Yeosang isn't sure that he wants to see things differently but Hongjoong's words do make him feel better- like he's someone important. 

Like he's someone special. 

Unlike Yeosang, San has always known he's special. In the life he'd lived before he had found his brothers and become a wild boy in search of treasure, he had been just a boy. 

He doesn't remember much of his life before the day he decided to run away but, he thinks, he's lucky to have some memories of that day and a lot of the ones that followed. He can recall more of the life before the one where they had first met, the one where they became wild boys, than any of the other broken boys- even Hongjoong. Even so, the moment where he ran is the clearest memory he has.

He remembers sitting in the back of his parents' car, the sun shining through the windows and the song playing on the radio. He remembers the emptiness inside and the certainty that he was meant for so much more than the simple life he was living. He thinks he knew about the treasure even then. 

He remembers pushing open the car door and jumping and then running and running and running- the elation and the excitement. That was the start of his long journey.

He remembers the gentle sun and the winding river, the bracing breeze and the ancient forest. He remembers being wild before he ever became a wild boy. 

He dreams a lot of all the things he saw in that life. The birdsong in the morning, the thundering of the river, the gentle crunch of leaves under his bare feet in the fall. He had been free then. 

He is not free at the Academy. There are grey walls and adults who watch their every move, who do not allow them to be the wild boys they are meant to be. San's only escape from this life is his dreams. 

Mingi does not dream because he does not know how to.

He remembers, though. He remembers being hungry and cold and aching. The long nights spent alone, the humid air and his mother's hollow expression. He had told her about his dreams, of all the different things he wanted for them to have and the places he wanted them to go.

"Dreaming of a better life doesn't change the one you have." His mother had told him once and Mingi remembers that more clearly than anything else- more than the hunger, the cold and the pain.

So, he does not dream. In his heart there is the desert and the sand, the sky and the sea. In his heart there is a wildness that he doesn't let himself remember for fear of it invading his sleep and making him dream and hope for the impossible. 

"You're holding on too tightly to your fear." Hongjoong tells him. "You need to let it go and allow yourself to dream- there is always beauty and hope in dreams."

But Mingi doesn't know how to let go. There is the Academy with its grey walls and the broken boys who are his brothers. There is food and there is warmth and a bed for him to sleep in. How can he dream of anything more? How can he  _ want _ anything more?

The other broken boys will not understand so he doesn't try to explain it to them. They are not afraid of losing what they have now. They don't fear the world beyond the Academy and instead long for the wild and a treasure they know nothing about. They are not afraid of having nothing because they don't know what it feels like.

Mingi will not let himself forget. 

Wooyoung, too, has things he won't let himself forget no matter how much he knows he should let them go. Memories of the life he'd had before he had become a wild boy are happy. He doesn't remember much of that life but he's certain of that.

'Why did I leave that behind?' He asks himself every night after Hongjoong has said the same thing he always says about finding their treasure. 'I'm not happy here but I was there. Why would I give that up?'

He knows the answer. 

They had been friends before they had been wild boys. None of the other broken boys, not even Hongjoong, remember this but Wooyoung does. He doesn't tell them but he remembers the light in their eyes- when Seonghwa and Yunho had been happy and so full of love and Yeosang had thrived in the beauty of the outside world. When San had been content with his simple life and Mingi had allowed himself to dream. When Jongho had been interested in more than the treasure and Hongjoong had let himself be just a boy and not their leader. He remembers all of this. 

The life before they had become wild boys was their best life. There had been no treasure. There had been no burning sun and no violent seas. There had been no stormy skies and no false promises of new beginnings. There had been no Academy and the same grey walls day after day.

They had been whole. 

Wooyoung knows it was a mistake to follow the longing in their hearts and in their souls. The search for the treasure has brought them nothing but struggles and unhappiness. They should have stuck to the easy path, he knows this now. If they had then they would never have become the broken boys they are now. 

Jongho wouldn't agree if he knew what Wooyoung was thinking. He does not regret the journey he is on and the fire that burns in his heart. Being a wild boy had given him a purpose he had been without in his previous life. Being a wild boy had given him brothers he does not think he can live without. He doesn't want to be aimless and he doesn't want to be alone. 

Jongho knows what it's like to lose somebody and what it can do to a person.

He'd had a best friend in the life before becoming a wild boy. His memories are little more than a jumbled mess of images and thoughts but he knows this much: they had been inseparable their whole lives until the point that Jongho hadn't known his own hopes and dreams from that of his friend's. He had been happy, though, or at least he thinks he was. He had been so young, so young and so happy until one day- until one day he was alone and his friend was lost. 

The time after that is hazy. It is dull and empty and without direction. He had been too young then to know what to do. He'd been too young to reach out to his lost friend, to try to get back what he had lost. 

He hadn't known it was possible then. 

Now he is a broken boy who had once been a wild boy. Now he knows he has seven brothers who will never become lost, that they can argue and fight and they will still be by each other's sides in every life that is to come. Now he has a hunger in his heart for a treasure he knows he will one day find.

Now, even trapped inside the Academy's grey walls, Jongho is happy.

Hongjoong is not as happy as Jongho but he is content. They are not exactly safe at the Academy but they are together and together they can stand strong against the adults who are constantly watching and whispering and  _ waiting _ . 

"Waiting for what?" Seonghwa will whisper to him after the others have all fallen asleep. He is Hongjoong's closest confidante- has been through all their lives together. 

"The same thing we are." Hongjoong will tell him. "We will know when it happens."

The longing in Hongjoong's chest never dims even in the days and weeks and months they are forced to live in the Academy's grey walls. He knows the treasure is out there.

His dreams sing to him of the wild and of the hunt, of the ship and the sky. He knows the warmth of the red sand as it slips through his fingers and the power of the wave as it crashes into the shore. He knows hope the other broken boys do not.

The night this world ends is the night he dreams of the man in the black fedora. 

They stand together in an unfamiliar world of white. They are alone but Hongjoong is not afraid. Hongjoong knows that they have met before- the man's eyes are familiar. This man has helped him before. 

"Who are you?" He asks because he wants to remember.

The man does not answer. 

"Are you here to help us?" Hongjoong tries again. "We're trapped- the treasure…" 

"It isn't reality that makes you lose your dream." The man says. "It's your decision."

"Yes." Hongjoong says. He has always known this.

The man holds out his hand and there appears an hourglass. Hongjoong's heart leaps. He knows then without a doubt that this is what they have been waiting for. 

He remembers the hourglass' power and knows exactly what it can do because he has used this hourglass before. It is what had taken them from their first lives and turned them into wild boys. It is the reason that they are now broken boys.

"There are countless dimensions in this world." The man with the black fedora says.

"Yes." Hongjoong says again because he knows it is the truth. He reaches out for the hourglass. 

"Wake up." The man says.

Hongjoong opens his eyes.

He sits up in his bed at the Academy and looks for the last time at its grey walls. He can hear the deep breathing of the broken boys around him and knows they're still sleeping. They won't be for much longer.

The hourglass sits on his bedside table, its sand gathered at the bottom. Their time in this life is up. 

He quickly goes from bed to bed and he wakes the broken boys who will be broken no longer.

"We are leaving tonight." He tells them, joy making his voice shake. "I have the hourglass."

He sees the recognition dawn on their tired faces. Like him, they had not remembered the hourglass until they had seen it. 

"Where will we go?" Yeosang asks, his eyes bright with life for the first time in months.

"We should go back." Wooyoung says. "To the life we had before we were wild." 

"The treasure is still out there." Jongho shakes his head. "We have to keep looking."

"Why can't we stay here?" Mingi asks and Hongjoong knows he is frightened. 

"Our time in this life is over." He tells him. "We need to leave."

He touches the hourglass and it flashes, blinding them all with its brilliant blue light. Hongjoong blinks and blinks until his vision clears and then he sees it- the sand in the hourglass flowing from the bottom to the top. 

A new life has begun.

"Look." Yunho whispers, his voice full of wonder.

And there, in the middle of their tiny room, is a door. Hongjoong's heart begins to sing and the treasure calls to him stronger than it ever has before.

San's smile is wide as he turns the handle and pulls the door open. He says, "let's go be wild once more." 

Hongjoong picks up the hourglass and holds it close to his chest and he promises, "we'll be together in the new life, too. We will find our treasure and we will be happy."

One by one they step through the door until only Hongjoong remains. He looks one last time at the room where they had been broken boys and he feels relief that their time here is over. 

Then he, too, walks through the door to their new life and prays that it is one where they are whole once more.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed! Pls let me know what you think


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